Ain't right on the Left Coast.

OK, so I recently wrote about how the West Coast sucks and all of that, but you know I didn’t mean it my WC hommies. It’s just the Dodgers and Angels botching the N and ALCS really got my boxers in a bunch.

Then this … Yankees World Series Championship Gear ads displaying right there in the right-hand sidebar of WCBias.com! Why don’t you kick our dogs while you’re at it Google Adsense! I’d remove the ads, but we get 1/1000th of a penny every time those ads get clicked.

But that championship gear got me thinking, maybe it’s time to create some more WCBias apparel (you know, like the popular Free Manny T-shirt and Thuggish Ruggish Nuggets gear) to combat the other Yankees Tees we’re inadvertently pimping.

How’s this for hypocritical: Now you can buy the official WCBias.com New York Yankees Suck T-Shirt for only $15 … with the Yankees “Secret Formula” for success across the bottom: $423 Million (CC, AJ, Tex) + A-Roid = 27th Title. This would go great with the A-Rod is an A-hole bumper sticker.

And speaking of ’roids, here’s to getting Manny back to make things interesting in 2010.

Maybe that secret formula will work out in the West Coast’s favor next season.

What is going on with the West Coast sports scene?
Two weeks ago we were talking about a WCBias.com-sponsored Freeway Series … but instead of L.A. vs. L.A. (of Anaheim, Orange County, Southern Cali., California, West Coast …), we’ve got New York vs. Philly?!
Wow. Who woulda thought there wouldn’t be any Left Coast love in this series?
Then the NBA season kicks off and the Clippers’ last remaining hope (top draft pick and Lambo idol, Blake Griffin) goes down with a busted kneecap before the season opener … and the curse continues. Sure, that was good for the Lakers, who collected their rings and beat up on the poor Clips in the season opener, but then they turn around and get smoked by Dirk and the Mavs?
I don’t know about you, but I blame the swine flu … excuse me, the H1N1, which apparently the East Coast is laughing about these days. Don’t believe me? Well, here’s a screenshot from the USA Today this morning (click the image to see it full screen). Apparently the Boston Celtics are getting a nice laugh out of our misery. Why do I feel like 2009-10 is going to turn out like the 2007-08 season … only we’ll get to watch the Cs win another title while the rest of us are in bed with the swine. PIGS! Hire some freaking copy editors USA Today!

The East Coast is laughing at us ... and our swine flu.

Hello friends,

The Boys Are (Not) Back in Town

If you’re reading this it’s because you’re a Dodger fan and, like me, you’ve spent the majority of this week feeling like you’ve been kicked in the balls.  And not some glancing blow either but a straight up Adam Vinatieri 50 yard field goal to the nuts.  We spend six months following these guys, reading about them, writing about them, watching them, driving to see them and thinking about them at just about all times in between.  The sharp, crushing sensation that began Monday night with Jimmy Rollins’ liner into the gap has dissipated into a dull ache that has finally settled somewhere in the pit of my stomach and, as of yet, hasn’t completely gone away.  As we enter into this offseason of uncertainty with arbitration clocks ticking, Vinny’s final season, and (at best) three-fifths of a rotation we owe it to ourselves to ask: when is it our turn?  When do we get to taste those fruits of victory that I remember hearing so much about?  I was in fourth grade the last time the Dodgers went to the World Series.  Matt Kemp had just turned four years old.  It’s been a while, you know what I’m saying?

Obviously, we here in Dodger land have it better than you poor yokels in Pittsburgh, Kansas City and Cincinnati.  I know this.  We’ve got a team that can compete essentially every year for a postseason berth which is more than most can say.  But is that it?  A few wins over some NL Central foe and a quick parting gift while thousands of “Los Angeles Dodgers: NL Champs!” t-shirts are shipped to some third world country?  I want to win.  I want Kemp and Ethier locked up with 5 year deals for $50M each.  I want John Lackey at the top of the rotation next year and I want Roy Halladay added at the deadline if need be.  I’m tired of running into the Phillies and getting beat every which way in October.  And yes, we will be with you guys win or lose either way…but we’d prefer winning, if at all possible.

BG

Guerrero -- the key to the Dodger's comeback?

Well, it’s looking pretty grim in Dodgerwood. Just when it looked like ther Men in Blue were going to tie up the series, a little rally spoiled their hopes, and now they’re seriously on the ropes.

With that in mind, I’ve thought of a few things the Dodgers can do to beat the Phillies. So, without any further adieu, here are the Top Ten Things The Dodegrs Can Do To Beat Philly:

* Convince the Phillies that the next game is Thursday and hope they don’t show up for Wednesday’s game.

* Share players, like Vlad Guerrero, from the Angels. (Hey, it’s still L.A., right?)

* Call for retro uniform night in hopes that Philly will wear blue and get confused.

* Cork bats!!!

* Secretly pour pepper in the jocks of all the Philly players and steal bases like crazy as they scratch their nads.

* Tell Broxton to get off his ass and start throwing 110-mph fastballs.

* Have Don Zimmer tackle Pedro Martinez.

* Make new rule where all Philly hitters have to bat left-handed.

* Sign Michael Vick as a free agent.

* Free Dodger Dogs to any Philly who strikes out.

Mandatory Dress Code for the Greater Phoenix Area

Big boys weekend and with our google-doc based fantasy basketball draft taking up almost all of my free time I haven’t been able to blog it.  Until now.  That’s right, folks-it’s update time.  And sorry, I’m too much of an emotional wreck to write anything about the Dodgers…I just can’t do it.  I have opinions and I have thoughts, I just can’t put them down.  Oh, ok last thing: I don’t have DVR.  I have a VCR that I seriously don’t even know how to use anymore so if I don’t catch an event live I’m basically screwed but everybody that has DVR always tells me how amazing it is for sports, will change the way you live your life, etc etc etc.  So the two times I have ventured into the DVR-sporting world have both ended badly though, the first being Super Bowl XXXwhatever when we were watching the game on tape and thinking it was live and ended up missing the Patriot’s last second (and thankfully futile) drive against the Giants and then this last weekend where Game 3 of the Cards-Dodgers didn’t tape due to some mysto-error.  So whatever, that’s where I stand on DVR.

Now, back to last weekend-Greenie and I drove from his place in Irvine out to hellhole paradise on Earth Blythe to visit G Slim and take in the sight.  And yes, that was “sight” singular and not “sights”.  THESE PLACES ARE IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE. The highlight of Blythe was going on an extended “Deliverance” style float down the Colorado River which ended with me huddled around a cooler of beer in a rubber raft trying to fight off the shivers.  After a lovely (and that is not sarcastic, the place is good) dinner in Quartzsite at Grubstake (less scary at night it turns out) the three of us got our game faces on for the much anticipated Cardinals game the next day.  University of Phoenix Stadium is, just like everything else in Phoenix, impossibly new.  Since I forgot my camera I was forced to take some images with my phone which didn’t really do justice to the niceness of the environment or the number of food options available.  Our seats were fairly pure, unobstructed views and a nice little escape aisle right behind our seats so we could exit behind our aisle rather than have to fight through people to get to the concessions.

It's Nice

The game itself was solid…slow first half but as fantasy owners of both Larry Fitzgerald and Owen Daniels it was a points bonanza (sadly we were going against Andre Johnson who might be the best receiver in all of football, in fantasy at least).  I was all ready to complain about the parking situation there which essentially consists of parking (for free) at a high school about a mile and a half away and then being bussed to the Stadium Friday-Night-Lights-style but the total wait time round trip was maybe five minutes which is outstanding.  No traffic whatsoever either there or back (coming from the other direction might be a different story though) and a mere ten hours later I was comfortably back in my bed in Santa Barbara.  Obviously you can’t put a price on hanging out with two of your best friends for a weekend but if you were to do so you’d be looking at about $80 for the tickets, $50 in gas and then a few bucks for food as well (food is cheap in those parts).  Good times.

This weekend: Vegas for Silver’s bachelor party.  Any tales from the sports books will be passed along at will.  As I type this Ryan Howard has just gone deep to put Philly up 1-0.  Dammit all to hell.

**UPDATE**

Much rejoicing.

Who will walk the nose first?

You have to admit, the two L.A. teams (including the one that’s not really L.A.) are looking pretty good right now. While they face a tough road to the World Series, we’re already thinking about the ways an LA-LA series would behoove us West Coasters. Here’s why:

* You can’t go wrong if you pick LA to win.

* Park at Anaheim, walk to Dodger Stadium.

* No snow delays.

* “Manny, meet Vlad. Vlad, meet Manny.”

* Think of the celeb sightings!

* Every game is a late start!

* On Sundays, it will make LA forget it still doesn’t have a football team.

* Before the game, Joe Torre and Mike Scioscia can get The Stoke at Malibu.

* Scalped tickets from two teams in World Series will help ailing California economy.

* “I Love L.A.” can be theme for BOTH teams.

Good game, good game, good game, good game, atta baby, nice job, good game...

Come on, did you really think I wasn’t going to watch?  A little five-game losing streak isn’t going to stop me, that post was nothing short of the greatest reverse-jinx of all time.  So now that we’re in we turn our sights to the dreaded Cardinals, a team that scares the living beejesus out of me.  This is a Cardinals team that pretty much had their way with the Dodgers, beating them 3 out of 4 in St. Lou and 2 out of 3 at the Ravine.  No es bueno.  Of particular concern is Game 1 starter Chris Carpenter who had two appearances against the Blue this year and held them to a measley 3 earned runs over 15 dominant innings (good for Wins in both starts).  And as bad as that looks, Adam Wainwright takes the hill in Game 2 and his numbers against the Dodgers are even better.  Barf.

It’s not that announced Dodger starters Randy Wolf and Clayton Kershaw are total schlubs but the Cards could leave LA up 2-0 with their foot on the Dodgers’ throats and ample evidence as to why 7 out of the 8 ESPN experts picked Saint Louis.  I’m going with whoever takes Game 1 takes the series, I know that’s not the ballsiest of predictions but it’s the way I see it…Dodgers shock Chris Carp and they’re looking good, drop the first one and they’re looking down the barrel of a gun.  Not much of a homefield advantage but at least the crowd will be into it.  Or not.  Come on people, let’s fill this thing up.

So I’m guessing the Monday Night Football ratings will be pretty good this week. You’ve got your age-old rivalry, two good teams, one undefeated team and uh . . .

Oh, yeah — Brett Favre playing against the Packers, his ex-team and the only NFL team he hasn’t beaten. So far, Favre’s having a great season, and it looks like Minnesota is clearly a playoff-calibur team. Yet, despite playing at home, I think the Vikes are going down in this one.

On paper, you’d have to say that it looks good for the Purple People Eaters. But I just have a feeling on this one. So often, after a big win, teams fall short the following week. And, as good — make that great — as Favre was at the end of last week, he isn’t the Favre that led the Pack for 16 years. There will be lots of pressure on both Favre and Pack QB Aaron Rodgers, so I look for a low scoring game, which will benefit the less offensive-minded Pack.

My prediction: Packers 17, Vikings 9.

*****

It must suck being a Kansas City sports fan. The Royals have had only one winning season in the past 14 years (during which they have lost 100 games on four occasions). Meanwhile, the Chiefs are on their way to their 7th losing season in the last 12.

*****

Speaking of sucking, remember when the silver and black represented a bad ass football team? The Raiders haven’t won more than five games in a season since 2002.

At least the 49′ers are good again. Thanks, Mike Singletary.

*****

Looks like some fun match-ups in the MLB playoffs. As good as the Dodgers are, I still think they’re another year away. And Albert Pujols is just too clutch. As I said before, I look for the Angels to surprise everyone. But the Yankees sure are playing strong. Hard to believe this team hit more homers than any other Yankee team in the history of the franchise.

Sabathia almost got 20 victories -- but not quite.

Well, there’s not going to be a 20-game winner this season.

As we approach the end of the Major League regular season, two pitchers have 19 victories – C.C. Sabathia of the Yanks and Adam Wainwright of the Cardinals — and neither of them are set to pitch Sunday. So for only the fourth time in a non-strike season since 1872 will the league not have at least one 20-game winner.

Interestingly, those four occurences have occured within the past 15 years. And, in fact, the number of victories for the league’s top pitchers has gone down considerably.

Not since Bob Welch — a decent but not great pitcher — had a sensational year for Oakland in 1990 (27-6), has a pitcher won 25 games or more in a season.

This obviously reflects a changing approach to pitching. Now days teams have more pitchers in the rotation, so each man in the rotation gets fewer chances. But that’s not the real reason. After all, Wainwright pitched in 34 games this year. Ron Guindry only pitched in 34 games when he won 22 games in 1985.  And Roger Clemens only pitched in 33 when he won 24 in 1986.

The real difference is that starters simply don’t stay in games long enough, making it more likely for relievers to blow their leads.

This year, Wainwright has just one complete game. Sabathia has two. In 1975, Catfish Hunter had 30 complete games — and that wasn’t an outrageous stat back then. Since 1999, no pitcher has compiled double-digit complete game stats.

As a result, today’s top-notch pitchers often only get 16 or 17 wins in a season. And Cy Young’s 511 victories will remain the most unbreakable record in baseball.

Mixing Metaphors

That’s it, I’m sick of watching this listless team play zombie baseball and I’m not watching until they wrap this thing up and head to the post season.  After another embarrassing loss to the Padres last night I am officially done with it.  I wanted to hear Vinny’s call live, I wanted to watch the champagne celebration, I wanted to see all of it.  Now I just want this season to be over with.  The worst thing (or best, you could argue) is that neither the Cardinals nor the Phillies have been on fire lately and the Dodgers still have a decent chance at keeping home field advantage through the post season and the way things are going now they’re going to need every advantage they can get.

So tonight I’m going to play softball and then I’m going to come home and watch The Office and figure out what to do about the end of this fantasy baseball season but the one thing I’m not going to do is even think about the Rockies (who never lose) coming into town tomorrow.  I haven’t quit on them and I get that every team goes through some periods where they don’t look good but are we even sure there hasn’t been some weird body swapping going on with these guys?  Did the doctors from (the Oscar-snubbed) Face/Off get a hold of Andre Ethier and Manny Ramirez and do some sort of switcheroo?  It’s one thing to get your guts ripped out like the Jon Broxton debacle in Pittsburgh but they’ve just rolled over and died these last few games.  Please guys, wrap this thing up so I can go back to watching you.