What makes Tiger so fierce? (It's not what you think)

I write this on the first hole of the 18-hole playoff between Rocco Mediate and Tiger Woods, so if Rocco upsets Tiger, I ask our fearless Editor to just delete this blog post. However, what makes Tiger so great is not what you think. Tiger has won 11 majors in this decade -- that is 2 more than any other player in their best decade, and we still have 2.5 years left and Tiger is a 4-1 favorite to win his 12th today. Clearly, you don't need me to tell you Tiger is great, really great. He dominates the game of golf like no one before him has. But why? What makes him so great?

The average fan might think it is because he hits his driver so awesome. Well, let me tell you that is not the case. Tiger ranks 165th in driving accuracy on the PGA Tour. He hits an average of 58% of his fairways -- that's 4% less than average tour player. Well you say, "We know he isn't the straightest hitter, but he sure is the farthest." Actually, he isn't, not even close. Tiger is ranked 65th in driving distance with an average of 285 yards. Now, I understand that he can hit it well over 300 yards when he wants, but clearly he often chooses to hit 3 woods enough of the time to lower his overall driving distance to 285 yards. So clearly, he doesn't take advantage of his distance as much as you might think. Just trust me on this one, his driving is not what makes him great. Actually, he is great in spite of his driving. It's true, he is a great short iron player, he is #1 in GIR (greens in regulation) ,but what truly makes Tiger great, has nothing to do with physical skill. So what it is Gslim? Glad you asked.

It's this simple: Tiger is the best reader of greens I have ever seen. "What?" you say, come on Gslim, pull your head out, you seriously didn't just say that the greatest golfer of all-time is only good because he can read greens. But think about it. Tiger's greatest moments come on the green. They come when he is usually outside of 25 feet, and they always come on the back 9. Putting is not physical. There is the famous saying, "putting is 90% mental and the other 10% is mental." On average, the farthest you draw your putter back on greens that are "tour" fast, is about 6 inches. This doesn't take a lot of physical skill. My mom can draw a putter straight back for 6 inches, but what separates Tiger from my mom and even the other tour players is that he can start the ball on the right line with the right pace.

I have never seen a guy make so many putts from a distance that other players are just trying to get it close. He has some kind of freaky cognitive ability to accurately predict exactly what the contour of the green will do with his ball. Consider some of those putts he has hit over the past few days. They were huge snaking double breakers that were going downhill and should have been impossible to judge. But Tiger seems to handle it with ease. This is truly a skill that you cannot teach. He has an amazing feel on the greens that cannot be matched by any player. His ability of judge pace and line truly separates him from even the next best player.

OH MY GOSH: Tiger just hit a 12-foot putt center cut on hole 7 of the playoff and Mark Rolfing (NBC announcer) just said, "Tiger is the best reader of greens I have ever seen."
I rest my case.

Game 3: Bold Prediction.................NOT

It's been so long since it was cool to use the "Not" phrase that I thought I would try to bring it back with this one blog post. Remember when you were in school and it was cool to turn to a buddy in class and say, "you are really smart..........NOT!" or make fun of the class dork by telling him he was really popular with the ladies only to wait 5 seconds and then drop a huge "NOT" bomb. Remember those days? Well Borat certainly does. Well I'm going to make a really bold prediction for Game 3 of tonight's NBA Final......wait for it..................................................NOT! Based on the whole home court advantage thing, the NBA wanting the series to drag out, the Celtics inability to win on the road, the Lakers complete dominance at home, the refs ridiculous preferential treatment of the home team, and all the other NBA conspiracy theories that seem to be real, my "NOT" so bold prediction will be Lakers by more than 10. I think it is so safe to assume that the Lakers will win that Im not even going to watch the game.......................................NOT. Was this is the worst post ever..................................Yes!

P-Dub the real Game 1 hero

An earlier post on this site credited KG with the Game 1 win, and while he is a nice player and an important part of that victory, I couldn't let our readers think that we were all in agreement with our fearless leader.
He is a great defensive player and had a nice 3 quarters, but, once again, he looked scared to shoot in the 4th. And when he did, he missed. The putback dunk was sick, but before that he had missed 9 consecutive shots.
He just isn's a superstar that demands the ball in the 4th and makes you believe he will carry you to victory.
However, Paul Pierce is. I know the magnitude of his walk down the tunnel can't be compared to Willis Reed, but it was the coolest thing I have seen in the NBA in a long time.
Before he came back, the series was over, way over. The building had gone dead, and Doc Rivers was saying things he didn't even believe in hopes of reviving his players.
They were one knee injury away from losing 4 straight games. Paul Pierce returned to the building and the Celtics had life again. At first I couldn't believe he was walking, but then again this is the guy who was nearly stabbed to death and not only lived to tell about it but came back to be an elite level player in the league.
I was sure that his walk back to the bench was to give moral support, but then the unthinkable happened and he went back into the game. He then went on to bury two straight 3s and the Lakers played stunned and shocked the rest of the way.
It is now midway through Game 2 and Pierce has 16 and has connected on a perfect 3 of 3 from downtown. The guy has so much heart. In this day and age were so many athletes would have been down and out, Pierce is not only playing but playing well. If the Celtics win (I think they will), it will be because of Pierce and not KG. KG is the reason why they are where they are but it will be Pierce who will have to carry them over the finish line. Pierce just hit his 4th trey. Right on cue PP.

"Bruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuce"

In Major League Baseball there are really good hitters, some great hitters, even a few once in a lifetime type hitters who rarely get themselves out and pretty much are the reason fans show up for the games. And then there is JAY BRUCE. What he has been able to do in his first week of games doesn't really even seem plausible.
Take for example his first game were he reached base safely 5 times and became only the 3rd player in history to do so. He also scored twice and drove in 2. He also stole a base just because he could.
He came back the next day and got a knock, scored a run, and o ya stole a base just because he could.
In his third game he went 0-3 because even Bath Ruth occasionally had an off day. However, he quickly made up for that with an epic 4-5 day to bring his season total to 8 hits in 16 tries. On this day he singled in the 10th and got himself home for the winning run because not only is this guy a great player, but he clearly seems to be able to handle the pressure. Just when I thought it couldn't get any better for this youngster, he follows up that 4-5 game with a 3 for 5 effort and hit his first ever walk-off (in Japan they call it a SAYONARA HIT) jack to help the Reds win 8-7 over the Reds.

“That’s the first walk-off home run in my life, at any level,” Bruce said. “It’s crazy.”

As he rounded the bases, the crowd stood on its feet and chanted "Bruuuuuuuuuuuuuuce" like they were at a Bruce Springsteen concert. The town of Cincinnati has already fallen in love with this kid, never believing he can top what he did the day before only to be shocked that he can. The crowd rises to his feet nearly every time he comes to the plate. He gets a huge ovation every time he catches a routine fly in center field. Dusty Baker said: "What a remarkable story Jay Bruce is. I’ve never seen a better story. If he’s living a dream, I’d like to be in that dream.”

I have no idea what this kid has in store for us next, all I know is that I don't want to miss it. Neither should you!

PS: I actually have no idea what Dusty Baker was talking about because if it is a dream, he is in it, he's actually the manager of that dream.

Fantasy Sports is the new Porn

I have ruined exactly 2.5 relationship because of my addiction to fantasy sports. The .5 is the one I'm currently ruining at this very moment. All good girls; cute, smart, fun to be with but I just couldn't put them first. Recently, I came upon the realization that fantasy sports has taken over for porn. The other night when my girl caught me at 4:54 in the morning trying to add Clayton Kershaw to my fantasy baseball team, she actually told me she hated me. It was as if she would have actually preferred me to be looking at naked pictures of Pamela Anderson then fretting over who I was going to drop to create space for my new ace (rhyming unintended but that is why WCBIAS is more than just a sports blog, its an experience). To be honest, my past relationships tell me that most girls would probably rather prefer their man to be surfing spankerwire than the waiver wire. Why you ask? Well, although girls hate porn they know their man would always prefer a real live naked women (them) to some image on a screen that they can't touch. However, with fantasy sports, the women today really aren't sure where they stand in comparison. It's uncharted territory for them. It's like, I know he says he loves me but he cries when his closer blows a save and doesn't seem to bat an eye when I have a bad day at work. Why does he spend hours a day on the phone with his best friend talking about the rookie call up Jay Bruce (he went 3-3 with 2 walks, 2 rbi, 2 runs, and a steal in a spectacular debut) but seems completely put out when I want to talk about our future? The answer is because fantasy sports is the new porn and we are addicted like we never have been before. Sorry ladies but it's true.

4:54 AM

The story I'm about to tell you is factual and without embellishment. You should also know I'm not proud of it either. If you have ever read this blog even once, you know BG talks a lot about Clayton Kershaw (and rightfully so, because he looks like he is going to be dirty).

Yes it's true, he is pitching today but more importantly he became available in Yahoo Fantasy Baseball leagues worldwide. You see, for the past 2 weeks upon hearing speculation that Kershaw was close to being called up from Double-A ball, I would routinely go to my league's waiver wire to see if he had been added to the game. Every time I typed in K-E-R (you only have to type in the players first 3 letters of their last name to find them) I would get a bunch of guys that I had never heard of and KERry Wood (certainly don't want that headache).

However, yesterday it was rumored that not only would he be called up but he would be starting the final game of the series against the St. Louis Cardinals on Sunday, May 25. This start would all but force those bastards at Yahoo to add him into the game. I'm not sure if it is a computer program that adds guys to the game as they are officially called up by their Major League team or if it is just some guy that loves to play with my emotions and adds players to the game whenever he sees fit, therefore causing all of us great pain and stress. So yesterday, I literally type K-E-R into my player pool 8 times before I finally realize that either the computer program or that guy at Yahoo responsible for adding players is not going to do it on May 24.

So rather then go to bed at 11:30 pm when I wanted to, I stayed up till 12:01 am to see if Mr. Kershaw would be my next waiver wire gem. However, he was not available at that time either. I waited until about 12:45 am but still no luck. I decided that I would just leave the computer on all night and check it whenever I happened to wake up or need a little sip of water.

What ensued next was not ideal or nothing that I'm particularly proud of. I tossed and turned all night thinking about a 20-year-old man who plays baseball and will never ever even know my name. Then the unthinkable happened, I started dreaming about him. No joke, in my dream I was in my room back in L.A. when I was 8 years old, but this time I was racing some invisible mystery to see who could pick up Clayton Kershaw first. I'M SERIOUS, this dream actually happened. However, this dream turned into a nightmare because not only did the mystery man add Kershaw, but I also flipped out and started throwing all my belongings through my window into a dark abyss. Strangely, my entire family was there to watch and no one seemed to try and stop my; it was as if they knew what is was like to lose a guy like Clayton ... Then I woke up at 4:54 am.

I thought about my dream for a second and the realized I had completely become a lunatic, addicted to fantasy people. What did I do next? You got it, I grabbed my computer, typed in K-E-R and guess who I found? I actually got nervous and accidentally clicked on a Chevy ad that took me to their website. I regrouped and got back to the waiver wire. I added Kershaw and just then my girlfriend woke up and said:

"Greg, what are you doing?"

I said, "Don't worry about, you wouldn't understand even if I tried to explain it."

She said, "Does it have something to do with fantasy sports?" I didn't respond.

She said, "I hate you."

I said, "So do I."

Me and Joba

Since I started writing this blog, readers have accused me of being racist, talking to much about Asian things, and not enough about West Coast sports. However, BG already covers the Dodgers and Giants. BSlim covers everything NBA and so that leaves me with the A's (what exactly is there to cover) and the Angels (real nice franchise with good hard working players but you don't want to read about them). Football is still too far away so the 49ers and Raiders are off limits but who really cares about them anyways. So I'm really just left to talk about what I know; sports that took place in my backyard years ago, fantasy players I hate (BTW Ryan Howard has found his way back into my good graces with 7 jacks in the past 2 weeks), Steve Nash and Japan. I know this here blog site is dedicated to West Coast sports, but if you keep going farther west of California you run into Japan. There are really more "west" than us. Our fearless leader of the site asked me to tone it down a notch, which got me to thinking about JOBA CHAMBERLAIN, who was also recently asked to tone it down. A week or so ago JOBA fist pumped and kind of twirled off the mound after he struck out David Delluci in the 8th inning. Cleveland players were upset by his showmanship and said so publicly. JOBA more or less got ripped by everyone for showing his emotion on the field, even former Yankee great Goose Gossage. He said:

"That's just not the Yankee way, what Joba did. Let everyone else do that stuff, but not a Yankee," Gossage told The Record on Saturday. "What I don't understand is, the kid's got the greatest mentor in the world in Mariano [Rivera]. He's one of the leaders of the team, so you'd think it wouldn't happen on that team.

"But there's no one to pass the torch anymore, no one to teach the young kids how to act. The Mets did a lot of that [celebrating] last year, and look how it came back to haunt them.

I guess I kind of understand what Gossage is talking about but just yesterday I saw K-rod do everything but sacrifice an animal on the mound in celebration of his three-out save. He literally pounded his chest, pointed to the sky, did some kind of séance and then left the mound. I didn't hear a word about this. Then on that same night, I saw Jon Papelbon first pump to the Gods after a key strikeout in the 9th. Dennis Eckersley (here is my West Coast coverage folks) was famous for this, so why is everyone coming down on Joba? I really don't have the answer but all I know is that if Joba stops, I will stop writing about my white boy Asian fetish. So, whaduya say Joba?

Joba and I quote, "Everybody has their own opinion," Chamberlain said. "It is what it is. I am not going to change."

Well, I guess neither am I.

What about Home Court Advantage?

Can somebody please tell me what is going on in the NBA right now? In the second round alone, the home team is 20 and 1. Is that even statistically possible when you consider that a basketball hoop is still 10 feet high no matter where you play? Seriously, what gives? In the series between the defending champion Spurs and the young and exciting New Orleans Hornets, the home team has won by an average margin of18 points per game. Think about that for a second. One day, the Hornets are just drilling San Antonio, making them look old and ready for retirement. However, switch gyms and the Spurs are making the Hornets look young and inexperienced. In a span of only 2 days, how can one team go from winning by 22 points and then losing by 19 with the only difference being the location of the game? I have heard all the explanations: the rims are different, the shooting backdrops are different, God likes home teams more, the refs are paid to fix games, its psychological, players like to sleep in their own bed, etc etc. Who really knows what it is but the home court advantage phenomenon is definitely alive and kicking. Even I have never lost a one-on-one game in my backyard (yes, the same backyard court I used to posterize my parents when i was younger, see: White Guys Love Assists). So it got me to thinking, does this home court advantage work in other areas of life besides sports?

Getting chicks: No, I had to fly half way around the world to get a gosh damn lady friend.
Having money: Um, not exactly, I'm one day shy of 29 and I'm back in school trying to get a Master's degree in Kinesiology because I'm so unemployable.

Wait, what other areas of life are there besides sports, girls, and trying to make a buck or two? I guess religion but based on the amount of missionaries my church sends out each month I'm guessing even they do better away from home. So really the home court advantage only applies to sports but considering sports is 25% of the pie and I spend nearly 90% of my time on that piece of pie, I think Ben Franklin misspoke when he said, "the only things certain in life are death and taxes." What about the home court advantage Ben?

White guys love the assist

Yes it's true, white guys really do love the assist. For other things white guys love, go here, it's an absolute must but definitely check out #4. Dropping a dime is something we can do, it is something we can understand. You see, I can't relate to what LeBron did to KG last night unless you count the times I lowered the rim in my backyard to 8 1/2 feet and set my dad underneath the hoop and told him not to move and then just posterized the sh!t out of him. Yes, I did that many times, even to my mom. You have to understand my parents are the kind of people that just wanted to see their kids succeed even if was just in the backyard. Good people really. Any who, outside of Japanese women, there is nothing more exciting and easy to love for a white man then some pro dropping a dime. It's like, "hey wait, I might be able to do that." It's a great feeling to know that what Steve Nash is doing out there I might be able to recreate in my intramural league down at Cal Poly. Steve Nash has been my favorite player for some time now, really my favorite athlete of all time. We both share a lot of the same attributes: white, 6-foot something, slow, can't jump, but just find a way to get it done. The thing about Steve is he finds a way to get it done on the biggest stage to the tune of 2 MVPs and a truck load of All-Star Games. This is what is truly amazing about Nash, he takes my skill set and turns it into 2 MVPs. He really has no business dominating the way in which he does but he DOES. This is why I and all people alike should love this guy. He is us but just way better.

PS: I hope you went to the site about things white people like because it is good but I have one problem with it: Asian women came in at #11 and that is just flat out wrong. I know the site says "Things White People like" and not "Things White MEN like" but trust me, the attraction white men have for Asian ladies trumps all the other things that came in the top 10 of that list. Deep down inside every white man loves an Asian lady. You might not know it yet, but it's there, just look for it. Coming from a guy that lived in Japan, trust me when I tell you, once you go Japanese, you can never go back. That's me over there in heaven!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mule K'ing

If Travis Hafner's nickname is PRONK and Adam Dunn is known as the DONKEY, I suggest Ryan Howard go by the name of THE MULE. Why you ask? Well he kinda looks like a mule but ask any fantasy owner what they think of him this year and you will probably hear something with a lot of cuss words and insults so I think THE MULE is actually quite nice considering the alternatives. I have been calling Mr. Howard THE MULE so much recently that even close personal friends are catching on. In a recent interview the Phillies coach, Charlie Manual, was asked what he thought was wrong with Ryan Howard and he responded, "Don't worry about The Mul....I mean, Ryan, he will bounce back, a lot of great players go through a minor slump." You see, even Howard's coach almost let it slip. They guy has K'd 52 times this year, he is on pace to shatter his own record of 199 strikeouts in one season. This guy is a gal damn MULE. Anyways, I was recently reading an article on philly.com about what is wrong with The MULE. Here is a bit of what was said about THE MULE and his struggles:

He's not swinging at strikes. He's chasing bad balls," Manuel said. "He's not following the ball. He's not staying on it. He's swinging too early and missing it by a lot." Manuel said Howard's problems are part mental and part physical.

"It's mental," Schmidt said. "But what you go through leads to physical problems. Instead of waiting and trying to smoke that ball right out of the catcher's mitt, you lose your sense of how to do that.

"I'm sure Ryan's mind is playing some tricks on him. You miss balls you should be driving, and you get frustrated. It's tough to figure out how to get it back."

"With Ryan, you're seeing his right shoulder fly out. His swing is probably a smidge more of an uppercut than it usually is, and his hands might be coming forward a little too soon. It's tough to generate power when that happens."

He's got to stay back and trust his hands. He just doesn't trust his hands right now. He's jumping out there on everything. He's not waiting on the ball. He's flying out.

"I think a lot of it is the [infielders'] shift, too. He knows they're going to pitch him inside, so he's trying to be quick.

So basically all THE MULE has to do is, trust his hands, stay back, wait on the pitch, start swinging at better pitches, stop letting his right shoulder fly out, have less of an uppercut, keep his hands from coming forward, stop jumping at the ball, and convince the other team to stop employing the infield shift. Thats it. Fantasy owners should feel at ease now.

That over there is THE MULE taking a dump before he hits.

Bad Man

Yesterday, on the Dan Patrick Show, Todd Helton was the guest and he was asked what pitcher he would be facing out there tonight and his response was, "um, ah, I think, welly.., no, um, actually I don't know, we faced Loshe the first night, so and so the second night but I'm not sure who it is tonight." Patrick goes, "you are facing Kyle Loshe tonight." Helton replies, "no, no, we faced him in the first game of the series." Patrick retorts, "Todd, I'm looking at it right now, you are facing Kyle Loshe, he hasn't pitched yet in the series." Helton says, "shows you what I know." Now obviously, Helton is not going to be confused with Tony Gywnn or Wade Boggs when it comes to pitcher preparation but that is just insane.

However, I do believe we tend to glorify these athletes and think they are something they are not or that they are doing something special to get the results that they do. Helton, not having a clue at who was pitching, roped a double off the top of the the wall in the bottom of the first inning off the infamous Kyle Loshe to plate Matt Holliday. However, without even listening to the game, I'm sure the Rockies announcers said something to the effect of how Helton against Loshe usually looks for the ball middle-in on the 2-2 counts because he knows Loshe is trying to set him up for the 3-2 change away. IT'S ALL BULLSHIT. These guys aren't preparing for their AB, they are probably looking for the next hottie on the stands they want to bang. At least Manny Rameriz is honest in this interview: see MannyBeingManny. If you don't have time to go listen to Manny he basically says (talking about his HR off K-rod in the playoffs) "I'm a bad man and I don't try to do to much up there but just react to the ball, you know, when you aren't feeling right but can still hit, you are a bad man."

JACKED

If you are reading this, you are one of 3 types of people: a) contributor to the site, there are only 4 of us if you can even count me, b) possibly a friend of one of the contributors, but I seriously doubt that, or c) some dude looking for porn that somehow ended up here.

Either way there is no point in writing anything of substance here because you aren't reading it, and I really don't have anything brilliant to say anyways, however, with the recent arrest of Cedric Benson (that's him to the left, what the hell happened on that boat anyways?) and the soon to be arrested Marvin Harrison, I just can't get over how pathetic and stupid these NFL footballers have become.

Let me see, you have millions of dollars, play a freakin' sport for your job, probably get more ladies then you know what to do with, work about half the year (did I mention you get to play a sport for living?), and you just can't get out of the way of yourself. I heard Mike Florio on the Dan Patrick show say that over the past 3 years, the longest the NFL has gone without a player being arrested is 27 days!!!!!!! Can you believe that?

At best, one player every month is arrested that plays in the National Football League. I'm mediocre to horrible at math, but that does not seem good. I wonder how long it would have to take for every player in the league to get arrested?? Without looking at the mean data, let's just assume on average one player every 20 days is arrested. (I'm sure it's the same guys over and over getting hassled, but for fun let's just assume everyone only gets jacked once). There are 45 active players on each team every week. The league has 32 teams, that is a total of 1,440 total players. If only one player gets arrested every 20 days, it would take 28, 800 days, or around 79 years for the entire league to get jacked. On second thought, that doesn't seem so bad. Carry on boys.

It's "SURE-ZUR"

It's Saturday and my phone rings and I see its my friend Joe Becko calling. I had recently called him to say hi and see how he was doing so I thought he was just returning my call from a few days ago. I say, "Joe, what's up?" He replies, "I can't talk long but I'm at the Cards/Cubs game and just took pictures with Pujols, DLee, and stood right next to Fukudomo" (I know that's not how you spell his name but I will get to that in a second). I want to yell at him and tell him that his name is Fukudome but I'm basically stunned and not sure how to respond. I go, "what, what, wait, what are you doing there?" Joe says, "My friend Travis is friends with Joe Buck and we our his guests today but I will call you after the game." In case you don't believe me, my friend Joe is the guy in the red shirt with the look on his face like what the hell am I doing here. You see, he didn't deserve to be there. This is the guy that can't pronounce any of the players names. He has butchered so many in the past that I have stopped making fun of him because its to easy (see FUKUDOMO). This is the guy in your city rec league that will drive to the hoop for an easy two when you are down 3 with 2 seconds to play. Just no recognition of clock and score. This is the guy that you don't want as your pitcher during a rundown between third and home in softball because trust me, he wont be in the right spot and the runner will score.

Anyways, I write this because the rookie phenom Max Scherzer is pitching tonight in his first ever start and I expect it to be one heck of a sporting event. If you don't play fantasy sports then you probably haven't heard of him but in his debut out of the bullpen he pitched 4 1/3 innings, got all 13 batters out and even struck out 7 of them. He has a tough name to pronounce but it sounds like "SURE ZUR." I know my friend Joe will never get this right but you really should because this kid is going to be good.