Down goes Sexson! Down goes Sexson!

Seattle Mariners “slugger” Richie Sexson was suspended six games by MLB on Friday for his helmet-throwing incident Thursday night.
That’s right, the 6-foot-8, 240-pound Sexson charged the mound (here's video) and threw his hat at Rangers pitcher Kason Gabbard after the left-hander offered up a little chin music in the fourth inning of a 5-0 victory over the Mariners.
The benches cleared but no punches were thrown — just a plastic Rawlings lid in the direction of the Rangers’ 6-3, 200-pound southpaw.
Which begs the question: who would’ve won an NHL-style brawl had Sexson not been a pansy and actually thrown a punch?

Tale of the tape:

KASON GABBARD Position: LHP Size: 6-3, 200 Age: 26 Birth place: Oxford, Ohio Season: 2nd Salary: $396,390

RICHIE SEXSON Position: 1B Size: 6-8, 240 Age: 33 Birth place: Portland, Ore. Season: 11th Salary: $15,500,000

Fight Analysis:
With that size, reach and enough pop to run into 300 career bombs, you’d have to label Sexson the favorite -- especially since he's a West Coast guy. The 6-8 Sexson actually pinned Gabbard to the ground during Thursday’s scuffle, injuring the pitcher’s leg and forcing him to leave the game.
Then again, with a .209 average and 36 strikeouts in 33 games, the 15.5-million dollar man might have a hard time connecting against the crafty no-name left-hander, who comes in making $396,000 but is unbeaten at 1-0 with a 1.85 ERA in five appearances.

And the winner is:
Gabbard in a monumental upset, stunning Sexson —who whiffed on a sweeping right — with a jab to the chin followed by two big left hands that put the helmet hucker out cold on the canvas.